The Pain of Pleasure

The pain of sending back the pleasures
From where they came just before they could see
The reality of life, before
They could enjoy, it is a pleasure too
Of a different kind, almost
Inexpressible with either look or words;
The pleasure I am having now,
Since I must send you home at once
For a better world is waiting
There to live with you, no matter
Whatever I may feel. This strange numbness
While I can see but can not feel a thing
Is yet another pleasure too,
Deriving from the numbness of a pain.

Then one day I know I would find
Somehow I have grown indifferent
And overcome all sorts of pain
Anyone might think of giving me.
Isn’t that an immense pleasure too?
Like the days I’m passing, right now
When every now is as long
As forever, since I have seen you go
Home to live with the better life,
With no care and once looking back.
This freedom from the pulling care
Is the best of them all, always
Free as bird from worries and earthly woes
Deriving from a bleeding brain.

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